Finding New Love

Sometimes we get so wrapped up in the moment, that we miss the bigger picture; the full effect that it has on our life. Like when my mom took me on a cruise to mend a broken heart and it resulted in a new love.

Rekindled Memories

A few years ago, I purchased a scanner to turn my thousands of slides into digital photos. Despite my best efforts to protect those transparencies over the years, I found when I scanned the slides, they had dust on them. No matter what I tried, I could not get that dust off. As a result, I needed to go through each of the digital photos and touch them up to remove the flaws caused by the persistent dust. Being on lockdown during this global pandemic has given me the time to work on those photos.

As I was working on them, I came across some of my earliest shots. Photos I took when I was just learning to use a 35mm camera, which in turn brought back the memory of one of my earliest trips.

Broken Hearted

My world had just fallen apart. My husband and I had split up after less than two years of marriage. I was all of 24 years old; I felt so much a failure and broken hearted. At that point, I wasn’t sure what to do with my life, I just knew I had to keep moving forward. I returned home to live with my mother and head back to college in the hopes of completing a bachelor’s degree. I wasn’t sure if I ever wanted to find a new love.

As the youngest of three children, and the only girl, my mother and I were always close. The death of my father eight years earlier had brought us even closer. So, Mom, being Mom, decided to take me on a Caribbean cruise to boost my spirits and help mend my broken heart. Little did I know, it would change my outlook on life.

Old School Cruising

It was the early 80’s and cruising was quite different than it is today. The megaships now cruising the world weren’t even a dream. There was a teeny tiny pool, a small casino, and a show every evening, that featured the cruise director and his wife. Mom had gone for luxury; we had a cabin with a window!

Ports of Call in Hispaniola

Our cruise departed Miami and truthfully, I don’t recall all the places to which we traveled. What I do remember were our ports of call on the island of Hispaniola; Cap Haitien, Haiti, and Puerto Plata, Dominican Republic.

I was shocked by what I saw in these two ports of call: bare naked children playing in the streets or dirt patches that passed for yards. Women washing their clothes in the gutters on the side of the road. Clothes laying on the top of bushes slowly drying in the hot humid air. Some homes were mere lean-tos, looking as if a stiff breeze would tear them apart. The other more substantial homes didn’t look as if they could ever withstand the forces of a hurricane. They were even using make-shift donkey carts.

Had I entered a different dimension; the ‘Twilight Zone”? It was 1981, how could this possibly be? Did people really live like this? I was only 1000 miles from home, yet I was in a different world.

The Duvalier Regime

Then I learned about “Papa Doc” and “Baby Doc” Duvalier. How the people of Haiti lived in oppression. How the Duvaliers would periodically travel the countryside throwing money to the local peasants attempting to prove they were not the thugs the ‘infidels’ made them out to be.

Eye Opening

I admit I led a sheltered life, and this was something I had never before seen. Raised in a typical middle-class family, I did not want for much. We never went without food. Even though they may not have been the brands I desired, I aways had clothes to wear and shoes on my feet. 

In my world, everyone had clothes washers and at the very least a proper clothesline. Why, to see a child playing in the yard naked was nothing less than scandalous! Every household had at least one car. Everyone I knew had safe, secure housing in which to live.

But I noticed as we drove through the communities, that people would stop what they were doing to smile and wave to us. The smiling children would run out to the vehicles with their hands extended for anything they could get. How could these children smile and laugh? Didn’t they realize how bad their lives were?

New Perspective

Having just taken up the hobby of 35mm photography, as I looked through the lens of my camera, I was struck by the sheer beauty of this island and these astounding people. As a new perspective came to me, the turmoil in my life melted away. I knew that I could overcome the relatively minor setbacks I was facing. In comparison, to these people: I. Had. Everything.

Hispaniola Today

Ravaged by disease, earthquakes and hurricanes, Haiti was, and remains, the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere. To this day, it still experiences political instability. I have not yet been back to Haiti, as it has been under a Level 4 Do Not Travel Travel Advisory for many years.

The neighboring country of the Dominican Republic is in better shape. It is currently under a level 2 Travel Advisory, which is due to a higher than desired crime rate. I have been to the country several more times over the years. I even spent a beautiful week in a small condo in Puerto Plata. The standard of living appears to be better there now, but, still, not as good as it should be. Tourism has brought jobs to this side of Hispaniola, but it has a long way to go.

40 Years Later

As I look back on these photos from nearly 40 years ago, I am still stuck by the dichotomy of the living conditions with the beauty of the people and their country. It has stayed with me forever. As I travel the world, I am ever mindful of how fortunate I am to live in my imperfect country.

A New Love

That cruise, Mom’s attempt to mend a broken heart, fostered a new love, travel. Today, I need only look through the lens of my camera and I can find beauty, kindness and hope no matter where I go, no matter how different from home it may be.

That new love of travel has evolved into a passion. I am no longer taken aback by what I find in the far-flung places of this earth. I understand that every country has its own normal. Each carries the baggage of its history. That said, I am also mindful that each and every individual on this earth deserves to be treated with kindness, dignity, and respect.  No one should live in unsanitary conditions. Everyone should have clean water. (There are numerous charities with the mission of providing clean water, I challenge you to research them and support the one aligns most with your views.)

I urge you to travel; see the world. Travel changes your perspective. It makes you appreciate what you have. Most importantly, travel will open your mind and your heart.

How has travel changed your life? Please share your insights on travel in the comment section below. I’d love to hear from you!